Pause... focus and... SQUIRREL!

Those of you who are tuning in to my ramblings every day will notice that I didn’t post yesterday. Believe it or not, it was a literal interpretation of the proposed topic in the little book of prompts. The topic for the 8^th was ‘Unplug’ and it talked about how we know when to unplug from all the electronics and take a break. I decided to take this to heart, and I unplugged for the evening. I spent the time meditating before going to bed, which proved to be a most wonderful exercise.

Today, the topic is to talk about addiction and the things that distract us from achieving what we want to achieve. I’m particularly guilty of this, because more often than not, my aspirations for doing well are stymied by one of my own flaws. Consequently, this post is about what to do to help yourself avoid distractions and get back on track.

1.            Is it a distraction in the first place?

To answer this question you need to be honest with yourself. Are you browsing the internet looking for something that is pertinent to what you’re doing or are you just wasting time? Do you really need to take an hour’s break or is that excessive? Only you will know the answer to these questions, and you need to be truthful with yourself. Sometimes you really do need to take an evening off and that’s ok as long as you really are going to get stuck in with renewed energy the next day.

2.            Why is your mind wandering?

Have you ever completed a project where the time just seemed to disappear completely? Have you ever been so absorbed in what you were doing that you didn’t notice people around you? I feel confident in thinking that nearly every one of us has and this is a beautiful place to be. I’m also fairly sure we did it without needing to be on some kind of medication. The point I’m making here is that if you are really and truly engaged in what you are doing, your mind won’t wander. This means that if you want to avoid being distracted, you need to work on making what you’re doing meaningful and engaging for yourself. If that’s not possible, perhaps you need to re-evaluate the task’s importance.

3.            What’s bothering you?

Things that upset, worry or concern us are like termites gnawing away at our ability to focus and think clearly. Anxieties and problems tax our already-taxed brains and prevent us from performing optimally. This is where time out can be helpful if it is used as a way to work through whatever is weighing on your mind. However, if you do nothing but dwell on your issues without working on ways to resolve them, then the time out is going to do more harm than good.

Problems, whatever they are, need to be addressed in some way. Ignoring thoughts and emotions is a dangerous strategy, because they always surface again, and often at the most unhelpful times. Addressing a problem does not necessarily mean resolving it, though. It means you take the time to suit your action to the scenario. Worrying about anything is counter-productive, because your worrying about something will have no effect on it whatsoever. Worrying about not being able to pay the rent at the end of the month is not going to make money materialise or your landlord give you a break; worrying if people will like you is not going to do anything to their states of mind. The only person worrying will affect is you, and it will do so negatively. Worrying has got to go and this is a form of resolution.

If anything else is bothering you or upsetting you, you need to go through the steps outlined in the serenity prayer: “Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the determination to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”

To simplify:

• If you cannot change something, let it go. They are draining and wasting your precious energy.
• If you can change something, then do it. What are you waiting for? Make a plan, and get stuck in. Sometimes just getting started is all you need.
• Don’t dwell on matters for too long. You need to take the time to think about whether the issue is worth all the effort in the first place. This is where meditation is extremely helpful.

4.            Keep your eye on the end

Remember that whatever you’re doing is for a purpose. If you believe strongly in that purpose, then you need to keep your mind focused on that. Yes, doing sit ups now might be a pain and they might not be all that fun, but in the end, you’re getting to get fitter and stronger and that’s the whole point isn’t it. Writing reports, doing research and going to talks might seem tedious at times, but if you remember what it is you want to achieve and you focus on how what you’re doing leads to that goal, it becomes a whole lot easier.

5.            Lighten up

Whenever I feel overwhelmed, I look at a map of the world, or I watch a video about the size of the universe. Sometimes our problems seem enormous and insurmountable, but we need always to bear context in mind. You are a single person in one place on an enormous planet that is but a tiny speck in the colossal universe. Somehow, every time I do this, my problems seem a little less massive.

This is advice I give to my students too, and it is advice I try to live by, but I mess up often. Lightening up means not beating yourself up when you get distracted. You’re only human after all.